In our personal and professional lives, we often encounter conflict that can upset or anger us. When conflict arises, it's important to manage our emotions and respond in a proactive manner. Sometimes choosing not to respond may also be appropriate in the moment. It's essential to take an audit of how you feel and why. This will help you focus and decide what is the best course of action.
In the past, I interned at a lab that contained roughly 7 or so graduate students. We often shared the same equipment, and it was essential that we each clean up after working.Otherwise, we risked cross-contamination, which could lead to unexpected results—some of which could be dangerous.
I was a little nervous about making mistakes around peers with so much experience, so I tried to be very conscientious about cleaning up after myself. As the new person in the lab, I was sometimes the first suspected of leaving a piece of equipment dirty. Even in instances where that wasn't the case, I would usually clam up or acquiese if someone inquired. Occasionally, I would also get a little defensive. As time went on, I felt more comfortable expressing myself and clearly indicating when I was not the cause of the mess.
Looking back, I wish I had been a little more comfortable standing up for myself in that situation. Overall, the conflict was so minor and only required me to speak up. No one was upset or angry to begin with, though I shouldn't fear engaging peers when they are. For me, the experience was an exercise in assessing the scale of conflict, which I think is valuable in order to determine how to respond.